'Oh, no, not another one!'

--Satine in Moulin Rouge (Baz Luhrmann, 2001)



A Game of Pax, or Echo,Version 5




As over and over she rolls percentile high[1]
Drowning out of key you hear her cry

'Speak to me.   Why do you never speak. Speak.  
What are you thinking of?   What thinking?   What?
I never know what you are thinking.'[2]
        'I think we are in the Alley
I have a reputation to uphold.'
(your bishops and castles all inside the palm of my hand)[3]

        What is when we get there?
'Oh, Yes, Oh Yes, oh bugger this for a lark.'

If I wore my Freudian slip
        Would you prick my binary lip?

One track mined: 'I want to fuck your brain!
I'm stupid but I love the company of geniuses'

(when they find you've got a little in here[4])
Then not to seek nor strive nor even yield.
The gods throw loaded dice their feet are cold
The Lady[5] looks away and pares her nails
The panting boots of truth[6] can leave a mess[7]
These fragments[8] let them bleed and wash away[9]
She couldn't choose between the shower or the bath [10]
double dipped   old spice and guilty innocence,
Found tiny shiny[11] keys inside the car
But unlocked nothing.
      An apple a day -- --[12]
Two too unable stars beyond the pale.[13]

She swore off pop songs and lobotomies,
A man who threw out logical fallacies
like tacks behind a getaway car,[14] he feels
the very least he can do is to shut up[15]
Heu, modo itera omnia quae mihi
nunc nuper narravisti, sed nunc Anglice.[16]
        (It Doesn't Make Sense
For me to cry out in my own defense) -awil'd.[17]
Decrypt's a fine and private place[18], Acronum.
        Just act bemused
        if confused
Just did it for a poem[19] (it's all been done)[20].
We artists are as women, longing for love[21]
A linear brain is a pain in the -- -- --[22]
Like a sponge, a sieve, like, a trap
Mnemosyne[23] playing eetzah[24] with metaphor
The model can't be clearer from a distance
I cannot tell the truth I cannot tell
So " art may imitate life,"[25] she mused, but
My muse has ripened and rotted and repeated

Ω Ερατω, fickle bitch, bring your sister.[26]
Ook[27] Alpha Ook Omega Εχω Εχω Εχω

Thru Ronnie[28] Eris[29] Vesta[30] Dedalus[31] The Bastard[32]
My Pandora syndrome can beat up your Oedipal Asp's[33].
And even myth is long forgotten[34], enough
For revelling turgid-minded in lethargy
Like Me, Like Me[35], our automatic sympathy...



[1] percentile high In Pax, a random number out of percentile dice (two ten-sided) which is above your skill level (a number usually between twenty and fifty) is an unsuccessful action.   Additionally, a high standardized test score.

[2] Speak...Thinking T.S. Eliot, "The Waste Land" lines 113-115.

[3] your...hand   Poe, "Control" full lines run "You may be king for the moment/but I am a queen understand/and I got your pawns and your bishops and castles/ all inside the palm of my hand."   In parentheses because out of context in all ways, shapes, and forms.  This concept album, "Haunted," samples Poe's dead father's voice: "In contemplation of an enormous and cold universe, there is something comical to the idea that we can really enforce our will on others.   'It's your world, do with it what you wish'-no, that's not the way to do it."

[4] When...here Tori Amos, "Sugar".

loaded dice Lois McMaster Bujold, The Curse of Chalion p. 293 in ARC (published August 2001)

The...cold  ABBA,  "The winner takes it all" : "The gods make throwing dice their minds are cold as ice." A nickname for the GM in tabletop gaming circles is "God."

[5] The Lady   in Terry Pratchett's various Discworld novels, The Lady (whose eyes are pure green and prefers to choose her followers rather than vice versa) is known as the most ambitious and dangerous player in the Gods' role-playing game otherwise known as the world.  Deliberate ambiguity between The Lady (Luck) and the Daughter of Spring, also known as The Lady in Bujold's Chalion.

[6] Boots of Truth a Pratchett Colloquialism: "A lie can run around the world before the truth has its boots on"

[7] can...mess   Tori Amos, "hey Jupiter." "boy your boots can leave a mess."

[8] These fragments   Eliot, line 431

[9] let...away  Tori Amos, "Precious things"

[10] Couldn't...bath  Amos, "hey Jupiter.": "Your apocalypse was fab for a girl who couldn't choose between the shower or the bath."

[11] Ani DiFranco, "Grey"

[12] an... dayThe Baroness Elsa von Freytag Loringhoven, "A Dozen Cocktails - Please"

[13] Amos, "Doughnut Song".  Most obscure and inapplicable part of an applicable song.   See appendix 1.

[14] A...car  Helen DeWitt, The Last Samurai,p. 57

[15] the...up Tom Lehrer, That was the Year that Was. "One problem that occurs more and more frequently these days in books and movies is the inability of people to communicate with the people they love: husbands and wives who can't communicate, children who can't communicate with their parents and so on.  And the characters in these books and movies, and in real life I might add, spend hours bemoaning the fact that they can't communicate.   I feel that if a person can't communicate the very least he can do is to shut up."

[16] Heu...Anglice  Conversational Latin.  To your Lawyer. "Okay, repeat everything you just told me, but this time in English."

[17] Doesn't...defense Poe, "Wild."   Reference additionally to: "Wild because I would do anything/to tear you off your precious fence/so this is what it's like living in Limbo/first I'm high then I'm so low"

[18] is...place Bujold, Brothers in Arms  p. 71 "The grave's a fine and private place, but none, I think, do there embrace"   Apparently from "To his Coy Mistress."

[19] just...song Dave Matthews Band, "I Did It"

[20] "It's all been done" woohoowho? Barenaked Ladies.

[21] We...love Thomas Mann, Death in Venice

[22] Pain... Neal Stephenson, Cryptonomicon. "...σ[horniness]self σother implies that he is, in the long run, dependent on other human beings for his mental clarity and, therefore, his happiness.  What a pain in the ass!"

[23] Mnemosyne Titaness of memory

[24] eetzah (first syllable is a squeak) word for "freeze tag / that which can never be forgotten" in hrooai, a language written vertically and therefore difficult to reproduce in-text (see appendix 2), created by Jesse Liptrap,  Elisabeth Cohen, Stephanie Mitchell, Janet Bruesselbach, and others at the Mirman school in 1998; spoken fluently even then by only three.

[25] Art...life Ani DiFranco, "Superhero".   "Art may imitate life, but life imitates TV"

[26] bring your sister  Tori Amos, "She's your Cocaine"

[27] Ook the only phonetic sound in the language of Pratchett's orangutang Librarian at Unseen U.   Also English phonetic of negative proclyctic adverb ουκ meaning "not" in ancient Greek.

[28] Ronnie Soak, Hygenic Dairyman, the Fifth Horseman from Terry Pratchett's The Thief of Time.  Also, the first stage in the quasi-Masonic five-stage historical pattern.

[29] Eris, Goddess of Discord.

[30] Vesta, goddess of the hearth, associated wuth virgins.

[31] Dedalus an¬‚ Anglicized (and gaelicized) version of the "cunning artificer"'s name; from James Joyce.

[32] The Bastard God of the unexpected, unseasonal and miraculous in The Curse of Chalion

[33] Asp's Asperger's syndrome is a shadow form of autism in which the social and empathetic mechanisms of an otherwise brilliant mind are handicapped; the psychological definition of debilitating nerdiness.

[34] And...forgotten   Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World p. 1

[35] Like...Me   Bjork, "Isobel"

Appendix 1


Full lyrics to "Doughnut Song" by Tori Amos


Hand me a drink and a kick and your message
You'll never gain weight from a doughnut hole
Then thought that I could decipher your message
There's no one here, dear
No one at all

And if I'm wasting all your time this time
Maybe you never learned to take
And if I'm hanging on to your shade
I guess I'm way beyond the pale


         
And summer men can grow cold can grow perty
(You told me it's over.)
Blood can be pretty like a delicate man
You can tell me over and over you're sure
Copper to steel to a hinge that has faltered
(You told me it's over over and over)
That lets you in, lets you in, lets you in
(Come in Houston don't you watch us all die)

chorus

    something's just keeping you numb.
you told me last night you were a sun now
with your very own devoted satellite
happy for you and I am
sure that I hate you
two suns too many
too many able fires heyes
You've been wasting my time this time
I said you'd never learn to take
And if I'm hanging on to your shade
I guess I'm way beyond the pale
hand me a drink and a kick and your message
you'll never gain weight from a doughnut hole.

         

Appendix 2


  hrooai text


Other notes: I would have liked to quote Derrida's discussion of the Echo myth from the recent quasi-documentary, but couldn't find a transcript.  So see that.